Things I love...

That I can throw my shoes outside while I wash the floor.

That I can hang laundry outside after I wash it in my bathtub because I don't have enough to make a full load.

That I have some itty bitty plants growing. And some large ones from Em!

That I have the freedome to clean as fast or slow as I want, and noone can tell me I'm doing it wrong.

~~~

But sometimes, I miss that my husband is home for the summer.

And the year we bought plants so I wouldn't have to wait for them to germinate.

And that I had TWO cameras then and have none now. (except the one on my phone or computer, neither of which takes very good photos).

(Little balcony garden from the first summer we were married. How I miss that little appartment and all the room and balcony and light that went with it.)

On hiatuses and learning about outside, inside

I apologize. I've been on a bit of a hiatus lately, and still am a bit. Dave and I have been trying to settle back in since school started, and certainly things were pushed to the side. Like Dear0ne. But rest assured, dear friends, it has not disappeared, Dear0ne still exists!

But I felt I should share a post I wrote for class (each week we make posts on our class's blog. It's a pretty cool concept, I think). This week we watched a film titled 'Indecent Exposure.' It was a documentary-like film about racism and stereotypes, and a seminar that one woman puts on to try to break them down. Here's what struck me the most;

This video made me want to cry, scream and shake someone. I was hurt, I was moved and as much as I began to loath what the woman was doing to the blue eyes, it certainly got me thinking. The one point that stood out to me the most was when one of the blue eyes began talking about how he didn't see himself as a 'blue eye boy.' He got attacked for his statement, and one of the brown eyes told him he should see people as brown eyes because it's what makes him who he is. I agreed, claiming you're colourblind can be demeaning. And then came the moment I had waited for. Without any words, a clip was shown of the blue-eye walking out of his house with his children. And they definitely weren't blue eyes.

In that context, when someone says 'i don't see myself as white/ brown/black/ yellow/ etc' or 'i don't see you as white/brown/black/yellow/etc,' they don't mean it to be offensive. they're not saying they don't value who you are, but that regardless of their skin colour, they're still a person. Dave and I, one day, want to adopt. One of the first questions we get asked when we tell people is 'from where?' We tell them from where ever we are. It doesn't matter to us if we have little brown babies or little black babies or little white babies. They'll still grow up to be children, teens and adults. Our families like to joke about how we'll have the 'colourful' family (we are the only siblings on Dave's side who don't have children of our own yet). We love the idea that we'll have children that need a home- from where ever God sees fit.

Day Six of Life Without Dave

Everytime I meet with someone I know, they ask about Dave and I. It's weird, I tell them. The first night I woke three times and had a hard time figuring out where I was. Apparently there's a big difference between the side of the bed and the middle. What else am I supposed to tell them? I've been watching mostly Disney movies because I don't want to see happy romantic couples because it makes me miss my husband? Or that the dishes have dwindled to less than half their size? For his program he MUST go on placement during his breaks between semsters. Kind of like being in a co-op program. Unfortunately, it just so happens he's good enough to win out over his classmates and get a great placement in another town. And maybe that's another reason I'm pursuing a flexible career- one that could take me anywhere.

On a better note, the King of Rock and Roll has taken up space in my home since Dave left. The dark-haired crooner seems to have filled some of the empty space, but nothing can compare to having my real-live husband around. But it makes me realize a few things about myself.
1. I do not hate rock and roll. James Durbin was starting to make me question. It's just the off-key screaming and swagger I don't like.
2. I really really love the 50's. The music, the drunk-uncle dancing, the skirts, the way everything seemed just a little easier, the way going out for ice cream or shakes was still cool, and the way young people were going to take over the world.
3. I adore my husband. And it's listening to his breathing (snoring, no) that I miss at night, that's made me unable to sleep for the past week.